You suck!

Dear Starbucks,

I wish this was a letter congratulating you and your exemplary staff and products. Sadly, it is not… I can honestly say the times I’ve had both awesome service AND coffee, with a fresh baked good on the side, is few and far between.

For instance, is it not fair to expect a fresh croissant if you’re paying for it? Would it not be off-putting to get said croissant and be able to thunk it on the counter and have it echo?

Thankfully, I was already aware of your coffee “specialists” shady behavior of trying to pass off stale merchandise… If I wanted to break my teeth, I would eat some nuts or hard toffee. The next time, I may just send you the invoice for the dental work by eating your unforgiving “food”.

And might I mention that your perky barista couldn’t quite grasp what the problem was… “Would you like a fresh one?” she asked in high pitched mousy voice.

Yes, I would like a fresh one….

On another occasion, I ordered a chocolate milk for my then four year old son. I was momentarily confused why he wasn’t chugging it down as he normally does. That is, until I picked up his cup and it rattled. Imagine my surprise when I discovered the ice that was so thoughtfully put in. I asked the girl why there was ice in the milk, to which she replied, “Oh do you not like that?”

No I do not like that. It’s not an iced coffee for goodness sake.

Dr. Seuss’s Green eggs and ham are flashing in my head right now.

Oh, and another thing, where exactly do you buy your tea? I had ordered a chamomile tea on one occasion, and it definitely did not taste like it should. in fact, there was no taste at all!

So I know you’re not going to be devastated, but I, for one, expect friendly service, along with edible products that are NOT highly inflated price wise.

So, I think I’ll take my money to Tim Horton’s, where at least they don’t charge an arm and a leg for a coffee, and the staff are usually pretty friendly. They’re also willing to right any mistake they make, more often than not, without the haughty attitude. You can take that to go!

Without further ado, I bid you adieu!

Signed,

A Disappointed and weary customer…:(

Avid reader, hopeful author. A mom who loves nature and animals. Visit Robin on Medium.
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Avid reader, hopeful author. A mom who loves nature and animals. Visit Robin on Medium.
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