This morning I woke feeling fed up with my life, my situation, and God. Nothing has been going right for, well, the past 10 years. I’ve tried to remain positive and optimistic with the full expectation that ONE day my life will finally be MUCH better than it’s been. And to be fair, it hasn’t all been bad. But there’s been a constant theme of sadness, suffering, and pain underneath the last decade of my life. I’ve tried everything to get rid of it. But like the smell of old food slowly decaying in your fridge my life has had a stank on it that I just can’t seem to shake off.
I’ve felt throughout the years but especially recently that something or someone has some not-so-funny trick they’re playing with my life. Kind of like the whole Job in the Bible situation where he was continually being tested and tried to no avail until one final day when God said enough is enough. Yeah, it’s felt like that except for I’m still in the thick of it.
This is the part where I fill you in a bit about my religious beliefs as I’m sure if you’ve been reading my stuff that you are quite possibly confused right about now.
I definitely do not come across as the typical Christian. At least I don’t think so. To give you an idea of where I’m coming from, I believe in God and Jesus. I was raised protestant Christian, and I’ve been baptized at least three times in my life. But by around age 30ish years, I decided to leave The Church aka Organized Religion and practice my beliefs at home. I don’t have a problem with other people feeling the need to go to church but I simply just don’t believe that we must absolutely show up to church every Sunday at 8:00, 9:00 am or whatever time like a job. I don’t believe that God cares about what time you go to church, how you dress when you’re at church, or if you go to church at all. What I do believe is that our relationship with God and Jesus is an inside job. It’s a relationship between the Creator and Createe (if that’s a word).
So, with that said, I have nothing against church-going Christians and to be totally real with you I have friends from all walks of life, including pagans and witches. I believe that everyone has the right to believe whatever they want. It’s their business, not mine. And to give you an even clearer picture, my beliefs include Christianity, Spirituality, Law of Attraction, and anything else that resonates truth for me.
I will tell you that my belief in God and Jesus has gone through some trials of its own. After my first husband left my kids and me, I went through a bone-crushing depression that permeated every fiber of my being and it was a real struggle to believe God was anywhere nearby. Where the hell was He? After that life-altering experience, I came face to face with Darkness and there was no god in sight. So I turned from Him for quite a while. Feeling lost and totally alone. My church didn’t help either. They were convinced that some magical prayer would save our marriage and rearrange my life back to at least something worth living but it didn’t. Everything had gone to shit and nobody was able to help me clean up the mess. It was during this time that I left behind organized religion and fell into despair.
I felt that if God couldn’t help me while I was faithfully going to church then He sure as hell couldn’t help me. So I struggled in Darkness. Alone. It was during this time that I would later find that God was truly real. As I struggled, I cried out. I prayed in between my sobs and exhausted moans for relief from the pain. I writhed on the floor in emotional, mental, and physical pain while the kids were at school. I managed to somehow put on a brave face for them and everyone while I was literally dead on the inside.
I was in HELL.
The only thing I had left was to call out in Jesus’ name and pray hard hoping that someone would hear me. To my surprise, it finally worked. The Darkness would dissipate just long enough for me to breathe again. For me to see Light in a completely dark tunnel. So, yes, I know that there is power in Jesus’ name and that somehow God exists. It was the one thing that saved me during a time of total death.
But even with all of this, I am still a firm believer that God only helps those that help themselves. That’s where the law of attraction part comes in. I believe we must do our part to live a successful and happy life. We must think about positive things as it says in Galatians 5:22–23, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.”
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.” Galatians 5:22–23
Positivity is part of attracting to you what you want. I believe God made us conscious co-creators. I don’t think that we’re just robots running on auto-pilot left to wonder what God wants us to do next. We are intelligent for a reason. And this is where I finally bring up what the point is of the entire article.
So, here we go, right back to the beginning. . .
I woke up this morning feeling totally disempowered. I’ve tried everything to get my life out of the dump its been in since I left my abusive husband months ago. I’ve tried being positive, praying, waiting, praying, and waiting some more. Asking God to DO SOMETHING already since obviously everything I’ve been trying to do ISN’T working.
I was laying in bed this morning feeling defeated, sad, and pissed. And then that’s when I realized that I’d had it. I leaped out of bed and started praying loudly and proudly in Jesus’ name that I had the power over my life. I claimed my personal power in Christ. I stopped whining and crying and started taking powerful action in Jesus’ name.
It was then that I realized God was waiting for me to realize that I had had the power all along. I just had to claim it in my life. We often think that we have to wait on Him (and sometimes we do) but we forget that He gave us the power the very minute we began believing in Him. God is WITHIN us. His power dwells within our very bodies and souls. All we have to do is CLAIM it. Stand firm in the Power of the Lord. And when we do, the most amazing things begin to happen in our lives.
We go from being disempowered to EMPOWERED.
So, I ask you, where do you need to reclaim power over your life? Where do you need to stand and say, “Enough is Enough! I’m taking back my power over ______________ in Jesus’ name!”
Watch how your life will begin to radically change from bad to good in the blink of an eye. You have to stand firm in your God-given power without doubt or fear.
And when you do, you will start living life as you were meant to — Empowered and Free of Fear.
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