It begins with a fundamental mindset shift.
‘’Oh my gawd, I am the fattest human being that ever lived ‘’ exclaimed my friend.
I looked at her for a few minutes, processing the enormity of her statement before retorting.
That is probably a slight exaggeration. I am sure there are fatter humans.
Harsh? Perhaps, but when such a phrase is uttered it screams for reassurance, sympathy or attention. These things only serve to hinder the situation rather than implement any real change.
The exclamation, while untrue offers a very real insight into the vulnerable state my friend was in. Hence why I felt the need to respond carefully.
Instead of kind reassurances, I offered what sliver of advice I felt might inflict a positive change and a slight shift in mindset.
‘Maybe you should talk nicer to yourself’
A shift in mindset is fundamental when pursuing any goal and especially when in pursuit of becoming a slimmer human.
Why do I offer this advice?
I encourage others to develop more positive self-talk because for a long time I talked to myself in a truly heinous way.
A way in which I would never dare to speak to anyone else.
I subjected myself to daily torture until I realized that the world is tough enough. Why make it even more difficult? I was creating additional obstacles when enough already existed along my path.
Why did I talk to myself in such a negative way?
I believe my negative self-talk was rooted in the belief that I did not feel worthy.
I was very hard on myself and constantly in pursuit of perfection. At least what I deemed as perfection.
How did this inhibit my ability to lose weight?
Unworthiness manifested itself in my inability to like myself.
This created an emptiness within me, which I tried to fill with the most sickening amount of food. Food was not going to fill the void.
My frame of mind was dominated by negative thought. The negativity from my mind seeped down into my body and soul. Both of whom I did not treat very well.
I began to develop an unhealthy relationship with food. I did not view food as a means through which to nourish my mind and body. It became a source of comfort. Something I did to excess. The binges did little to fill the void but succeeded in creating more self-loathing and a deep feeling of unworthiness.
With this mindset in place, becoming a slimmer human was beyond my grasp. I needed to begin with my mindset before fundamental changes could occur.
So, what changed? I developed a more positive self-talk
My self-talk was my greatest obstacle. I was constantly pitted in a ferocious battle against myself. It became very tiresome and was destructive for two key reasons
- It projected to people I met and those close to me the degree to which I did not like myself.
Often people do not know how to respond when you exclaim your insecurities about your body. To be polite people will generally dish out reassurances. However, it gets tiresome to constantly have to reassure someone and it does not help either party. Secondly, if you do not think highly of yourself, then why should anyone else?
2. When I speak negatively about myself it cements in my mind how I think about myself.
I believe that I am not worthy of being treated well, by myself or by anyone else.
I do not believe that I am worthy of being a slimmer human.
I do not believe that I can change.
I believe the image of myself that I create and project to myself.
This is bullshit. The ability to change or create a different version of ourselves is well within our grasp. It may be difficult to attain, but it is possible.
Personally one of the major stumbling blocks for me in my attempt to become a slimmer human is that I am entangled in the version of myself that has cemented in my mind.
I did not want to be the current version of myself. Yet, I lacked the self-belief that I could change. More importantly, I did not feel like I deserved to be the version that I dreamed up inside my head.
A significant mindset shift was needed.
Of course, this is only the beginning of the journey. The shift in mindset is merely the seedling. I need to persistently and doggedly pursue my goal of becoming a slimmer human if I am to succeed. That is the hard part.
But, I feel that this is a pretty good starting point.
What do you think is the key to becoming a slimmer human? Do you think a shift in mindset is needed? I would love to read your comments below.