That’s the only way to start
You create your life.
This idea is not a mystery to anyone. Sometimes people don’t want to believe it, sometimes they want to someone to save them, sometimes they don’t want to do what it takes to overcome their obstacles, but none of those ideas take away from the root idea that you create your life.
If you were not the one in charge of creating your life, that would mean someone else is. So if you wanted to change, what would you do if they were busy, or unavailable or dead?
You would need someone else to take the place of your original boss.
You would need to post help wanted ads, read over the resumes, conduct interviews, negotiate the terms of your relationship, and finally offer to hire them at a price they are willing to accept.
You could go the simple route and realize you’re in charge of creating your own life and get going on that. Then you don’t have to conduct any interviews or risk hiring the wrong person to be in charge of you.
If you’re willing to give up that “searching for someone new to be in charge of creating your life” work, you can use that energy to create a new part of your life.
We’re all wary of something
We’ve all got circumspections in our lives. We’ve all been taught to be wary of certain ideas and situations. One of those is the idea that we create our lives for ourselves. We knew this as little children, but school tends to drum that free-thinking spirit out of kids. In school, we are taught that the people in charge of our actions are better at deciding what our lives should be like than we are.
We’re also taught that it’s wrong to think any other way. So we become afraid of the power we have to make decisions for ourselves.
When we become adults, this pattern of abdicating authority over our lives continues, and we search for leaders who will tell us how to think.
But those ideas of control were initially designed to be used with groups, not individuals. That’s why the ideas don’t fit your life.
If you’re willing to give up the idea that something you learned years ago is still the way to live, you’re going to have a much easier time creating your own new ideas.
It sounds convoluted, but it’s simple to take what you already know and modify that to the way you want your life to be. Doing that is much easier than pretending the old ways are best.
Nothing’s perfect. Oh, wait a minute . . .
Perfection is in the eye of the beholder. Perfection requires you to compare two situations and decide if one is better than the other.
The problem with that way of thinking is that every moment you are living is unique. That means any comparison you make to any other moment in your life is meaningless.
That doesn’t mean you can’t arrange your life to be full of things you enjoy; you should definitely do that. What it really means is that every life situation is unique. Time spent comparing one moment to a memory of the past or a forecast of the future is time taken away from enjoying the moment you are living right now.
Of course, you can learn your likes and dislikes; it’s your life. But if you have been anticipating one particular moment to be the high point of perfection, and it is, does that mean all the rest of your life moments are going to be “not as good”?
That would be sad.
If you are willing to give up your single moment definition of perfection and accept that each moment is singular in its own right, you’ll have countless more opportunities to enjoy your life.
To see each moment as unique and dazzling in its specialness and perfection is a beautiful way to live. And it’s available to you if you are willing to think differently.
It’s not that hard
Surprisingly, personal change is not that hard to accomplish. It’s much harder to decide you are going to change in the first place, and then to take the first step. Once you get rolling, though, it’s more a question of keeping your momentum.
It’s also much simpler to start moving toward what you want if you are willing to give up the things anchoring you to your old life. Along the way, you may find that some of those old ideas will hold up well in your new way of thinking. That works.
It is the willingness to give them up that helps you create a great life for which you’ve been yearning.
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