Don’t be positive, or even negative. Be real.

“Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.” — Wayne W. Dyer

When you are in stress, people advice to stay positive.

You may have overheard these sentences:

  • “Stay positive. Be positive, think positive. Only you need being hopeful. Everything will follow you.”
  • “You are not lower than that, you can do this, anyhow just work with focus and you will get it.”
  • “Set goals and work consistently, you will get it.”
  • “Affirm your mind positively, visualize the better picture. Everything will be good.”
  • “Remember these 5 quotes, and you will be better.”
  • “You will get what you think, so think big.”

I can list down thousands of affirmations that reinforce positive thinking.

There is a group of people in the personal development industry who focus on motivation, quotes, and positive thinking.

They are the people who sell their products just based on the positive thinking term.

You may have tried this, but eventually, it’s external motivation. It doesn’t work for long.

Most people endlessly try to think differently. They stop their regular thought process and forcefully dominate on the situation.

Some people try to affirm daily, visualize every small detail, imagine a better future, but nothing changes. They use every technique to get daily motivation, but still, nothing makes a difference.

I tried some of the techniques, but only “thinking” never encouraged me.

So, understand the difference between thinking and the state of mind.

Positive Thinking Is Elevated State Of Mind.

Our normal state of thinking is neutral or balanced. Positive thinking is higher level thinking; It’s colorful. It enlarges the situation.

Suppose you fall in love with someone, your natural state of mind is to analyze things based on reality. But if you are thinking positively, your mind expands the experience.

With positive thinking:

  • You see the situation better and hopeful even if it’s not.
  • You interpret someone positively and notice only good things.
  • You predict only better, and avoid future consequences.
  • You subconsciously attract only beneficial things.
  • You decide based on the half picture.
  • You expect fast and need everything quick.

This is the state of mind of one type of thinking.

Gurus use this need as a weapon and sell their products. They make you believe that everything can be possible with just thinking.

Negative Thinking Is The Depressed State Of Mind.

Same as, negative thinking is a depressed state; It shrinks the situation and creates a false reality.

It produces pain, hurt, and emptiness. You feel alone, withdrawn and meaningless. You interpret situations as unfavorable and feel critical. And the worst part is, you try hard to come out from the situation without knowing the ins and outs of human psychology.

You think positive in the adverse situation, your mind obstructs you from doing this, you fight with the situation and anyhow dominate over it, Try to avoid the painful experience, use alcohol and expose your feelings in front of the mirror.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work.

Image by Avi Chomotovski from Pixabay

Focus On State Of Mind, Not On Thinking.

Positive or negative thinking is dangerous.

People buy things with the hope that they will pay the bills, but when they don’t, they will suffer even worse.

People influenced by numerous factors, and they decide based on thinking or feeling. But it rarely turns into real-life situations. We have pain problems, fears, desires, goals, and aspirations. We unconsciously fueled by these obsessions.

Your state of mind is your governing body. Thinking is just a way of expressions.

Your state of mind is formed through real-life situations. When you are feeling hurt, your state of mind will be negative, and when you have a good time, your state of mind will be positive.

So, tell me:

  • If you have been given a lower wage than your strengths and they advised you to think positive, will you actually stay positive?
  • If you are suffering from heartbreak and your friend recounted you to hope for better, will you feel better at the moment?
  • Suppose you are running in a marathon. You are drained, but with positive thinking, will you win?
  • With positive thinking, you can motivate your employees, but can you increase their productivity?

And the answer is, NO.

Positive thinking or even thinking, can’t change the situation itself. It’s vague commitments.

  • You can’t earn money with a false picture of the business.
  • You can’t improve the relationship just by reading books.
  • You can’t lose weight just with dieting advice.

And it’s way profound than you think.

Anything you want to achieve takes enormous efforts. So, any decision you take should be based on real-life situations.

Every situation is way deeper, so, you will be influenced by ether positive or negative emotions.

You can try to be as neutral as possible and make decisions objectively. As much as your decision is balanced, it will be more realistic.

If your situation is negative than accept it as unfavorable. Don’t try to be positive. It hurts even harder.

When you suppress the spring, it expands even speedier.

Let’s Be Realistic.

Positive thinking will destroy you because it’s based on imagination, not on reality.

Yes, some people say it’s real or help you to keep hope in the adversity. I agree with them. But the real problem is, if you just focus on visualization or imagination, you will create an illusive world.

If you just focus on positive thinking while playing casino, you will lose, but if you have a false belief of victory, you will play even more.

Most products are designed based on pain problems and advertise based on hidden needs. And it works.

Be real in any situation. Don’t overvalue or undervalue it.

Not most people have the gut to admit the truths, they crave for instant success and millions of dollars overnight.

But few people act based on real life. They know their fantasies and learn the best way to deal with it.

From my experience, positive thinking helps but not much. Yes, it provides hope, but when your state of mind is not on the right track, your situation won’t change itself.

Real life takes serious action.

In reality, there is no miracle or overnight success. You must pass through the process.

“I truly believe that everything that we do and everyone that we meet is put in our path for a purpose. There are no accidents; we’re all teachers — if we’re willing to pay attention to the lessons we learn, trust our positive instincts and not be afraid to take risks or wait for some miracle to come knocking at our door. “— Marla Gibbs

If your choice is based on reality, you can save your time, money, and energy. You will play ahead of the game.

Success is the result of practical actions.

Be real, be practical. You will be saved.


Passionate Writer, promoter of ‘Love,’ big believer of Positive Psychology and helping you to reach your full potential of self and relationships.
Passionate Writer, promoter of ‘Love,’ big believer of Positive Psychology and helping you to reach your full potential of self and relationships.
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