This is third in a series of posts on having a well-nourished life, documenting my journey from depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts to my current state of wholeness and wellness today. It is written for you, the reader, who believes God is still there, yet is stumbling in the dark, wondering where the path is to light, joy and that well-nourished life.
My intent in all my job changes was to get healthier. From the end of my educational career, to moving to a state position,
I kept looking for THE life purpose.
I had 9–15 migraines a month, I was officially considered depressed and I still needed to work, at least part-time. My husband had to take early retirement. So what was my purpose for working and how did I keep doing it when I was fighting chronic pain?
Finally, a position came open that I felt I was well-qualified for and met my skill set — a startup. I have always loved starting something new. It’s the finishing that is the bummer! Ha!
I applied for and got an educational job out in the field that covered the lower half of my state. It meant I would be traveling to school districts to advise them.
It was similar to what I had been working with them over the phone from the state level. Now I would get to meet them in person.
It truly was a win-win for me. I would facilitate workshops, meet people in person, do creative work and work only part-time. That meant I then I also had time to complete my life coaching certification and start my own business.
I would have the freedom of the schedule, collaborating with others and meet the lovely people I had been supporting the last two years from the state level.
One person even said, “If you closed your eyes, could you tell who we are by the sound of our voices?”
A CRACK IN THE PAVEMENT
As I have eluded to all along, it really didn’t matter what position it was. I was still carrying the garbage in my head that I needed to clean out. Now, with this great job, I could no longer blame the work.
For a while, things hummed along well. I learned new things, which I love to do. I enjoyed meeting new people. I still had migraines, just not as many.
Then the grass growing on the other side of the fence began looking greener again and a crack started growing in the pavement.
I began getting restless and getting the “if onlys.”
If only I had more help with my work…
If only I had the time to get my life coaching business going ….
If only I could…..
Over a five year period and a variety of events, I found myself digging a hole again. Don’t you think I’d learn by now?
Towards the end of my time at this amazing job, I found myself wanting to pull into the path of semi trucks that I was meeting on the road.
Whoa! Something is definitely wrong with my brain chemistry here.
Luckily I had a good supportive members to turn that around. Stay tuned for the next part of the series to learn how many members helped me get to the well-nourished life I know today.
WHAT I LEARNED
I loved that particular work. It fit my skill set and I got to support the education world, which is my past life.
However, work was not enough to make healthy mind, body and soul changes I needed to make. It was internal work I needed to do, not external. I kept looking for answers outside myself or actually in the future, instead of from within.
Until I was ready to look within and figure out what was in my head and heart, nothing truly changed.
Each of us are designed, I believe, by God to do certain work. However, I have found it’s an inside job. More to come on that in “The Road to a Well-Nourished Life -Support for the Inside Me”.
What about you? When have you changed work to find that it didn’t change your head or heart?
How did you handle it? What did you do? How important is work to you?
Work certainly is a big part of our lives. However, what you do with work and how it affects your heart and soul is the question.
I would love to hear your stories. Clap to let me know how you resonate with my journey and comment below. Check out my author page for other articles in this series. How has work held your heart back or grew your heart?
Visit Nancy at NancyBoothCoaching.com and find more of her work here.